I like to imagine my womb as warm and welcoming, her lining exquisitely molded and extraordinarily cozy and calm. She is pregnant always with expectation. She is filled with desire and hope, she floods with life potential, patiently ready. She is beautiful and strong. Her yearning ancient, she reaches ever for what could be, ever for the swell of new life, the expansion of love into new territory. She is unwavering. But every turn of the moon around the earth, she is disappointed, her desires unmet, purpose unfulfilled, her emptiness taunting. Her wailing sears through my body, racking me with pain. Her hot tears drain out of me, uncontrolled. Her grief sits raw, heavy and aching in my pit. Restless and roaming, it goes. And it comes in wave after wave, repeatedly debilitating me, doubling me over. I’ve learned to let her grieve, to give her space. To not exhaust us both beyond what we can bear. I’ve learned to slow down, take a breath, accept that I must do less, be gracious. For in...
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